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[Editor’s note: The Bard of Bedtime has struck again. Assigned to research and report on the topic of Sleep Positions, he (she?) instead submitted via Federal Express the following stanzas—accompanied by three cases of Reese’s Sticks, which were delicious.]
Multifarious and wondrous
Are the habits of our species
No more so than when we’re sleepy
And at last switch off our TVs
The positions that we sleep in
Span a spectrum that is vast
Nearly infinite—but hey, why not
Run down a few real fast
There are folks who find that tummies
Are the comfiest in bed
It is said that there are yogis
Who can slumber on their heads
Some are Starfish, some are Soldiers
Some are positively fetal
Some exceptionally versatile
(Like thespian Don Cheadle)
If you cuddle with your pillow
Does it mean you long for love?
If you toss from side to side
Is your mattress firm enough?
Front or back or in between
On your own or newly wed
Our position on your sleep
Is simple: Try a Yogabed
